Abandon Hope all who enter science

Science is a funny thing
You work so hard for sights unseen
And try the test time after time
They never work, and that’s the sign
For when you have quite given up
And lost all hope, despair for sup
Is when the assay finally works
You’d think Science was a sort of Jerk!

Photosynthetic Slug

Along the eastern seaboard of our fine United States
There lives a slug who slurps algae for hunger to abate
“Not too unusual”, you say when hearing with a glance
Until you realize its evolutionary stance
For not like us they take their food and put it in their gut
They strip away the chloroplast and leave them living up
and let the organelles survive and get hit with the sun
to make them food long after the algea’s carbon is gone
You feed them with some algae for a fortnight then you wait
An entire year they will live on with no food, not a taste!
But before you think that would be cool for us this trait to share
to meet our needs we’d have to be 100 meters squared!

Willow Tree

One could argue the first to reason
Through the changing leaves of season
In a humble willow tree
Jan Helmont sought epiphany
For how a plant grows from the earth
And dirt still there, what gives the birth
To all the mass of trunk and leaf
“I’ll try out science!” t’was his belief

And so he started with ground well weighed
Sprigs of trees with no delay
And after days turned into months
Five trips around the golden sun
He separated root from clay
And measured out the soil’s decay
As well as how much bulk the plant
Had gained during its growing spat
“The soil did not give its matter
To make this willow get so fatter,
It was the water that it got
For what else could it be but not?”

With irony I’ll add right here
That CO2 gives trees their beards
And guess who first supposed that gas
Came in different kinds and flasks?
Our good friend Helmont did, its true
Let’s celebrate with no ado!

Light Reading

The energy for you and me
Is made in our front lawn
By converting the sun’s bright beams
to excited electrons.
That drop potential blow by blow
And pull protons behind
A giant turbine turning flow
To ATP sublime!

Electrons once they’ve paid their dues
And formed a PMF
To ferredoxin are passed to
NADPH left
To create all the happy things
That all of us delight
From apple pie to cheesy string
And making darkness light.

But some do scoff at all this fun
And science they do diss
I’d like to see them in a run
Without photosynthesis!

Hydroponic Help

When my plants are young,
I put them in rockwool
and then they grow a week.

But then some shrivel up and die,
Before they get to speak!

Bulb

Just a root
that sat on the planting table.
Then a green thrust
like the spikes on a deer.
Soon, it grows
impossibly tall
for such a small bulb.

How can so much fit in so little?

Eureka

Sometimes,
I am late in my office
I am reading an old article
and two little Legos snap together in my brain
I want to jump up
tell the world
how to calculate the efficiency
of photosystem II
by shining light on a leaf
and measuring what it throws up.

But then I realize
that they probably won't care
and by tomorrow I'll have to re-learn it anyways

The Eurekas of today
aren't what the used to be
or are they?